Live With Regis and Kelly(Joy Philbin sitting in)
December 8, 2003
transcribed by Ada

Regis: All right, here he comes, a big star in the U.K. and here in America as well has appeared in the string of hit films now. And now, heís starring in the highly anticipated Girl with a Pearl Earring. Hereís Colin Firth! [audience cheers and Regis shakes his hand] Colin, my man, nice to see you again. [Colin reaches over to shake Joyís hand] My wife, Joy.

Regis: (leaning over to Colin) My wife thinks youíre a heartthrob.

Joy: Iím sorry for saying that. Youíre a serious actor, Colin, and I didnít mean to say you were a heartthrob. I mean that sounds so. . .

Colin: No, Iíll stick with the heartthrob. [audience laughs]

Joy: You donít mind that too much?

Colin: No.

Regis: No, he likes it. Boy, Colin, you do everything so well. These comedies that you make and then a serious film like The Girl with the Pearl Earring. Which do you prefer? Which area do you like to work in?

Colin: Well, the serious movie hasnít been a commodity thatís come my way much in the last few years, funnily enough. The English seem to be concentrating on the romantic comedy to an extraordinary extent.

Regis: Yes, they do, and they do a good job of it too, donít they?

Colin: They do. So, Iíd been dying to do a comedy for the first 15 years of my career, andó

Regis: Is that right?

Colin: And one has to be careful what you wish for becauseó

Regis: (interrupting) Youíll get it!

Colin: óIíve been in the comedy vortex for the past five years.

Joy: And Bridget Jones, of course, was a wonderful comedy. And, youíre doing the sequel.

Colin: Weíre doing the sequel now, yeah.

Joy: Now, I have to ask, is Renee Zellweger packing on the poundage again for this movie?

Colin: Well, I have to say, that is the question I get asked most often. How big is Reneeís bottom, theyíll all go. (audience laughs)

Regis: Now youíre talking!

Colin:  Do you want it in pounds or kilos?  Itís a long time since I actually weighed it but...She has achieved very pleasing proportions, I think.

Regis: Well, now, the poor baby. Is she drinking? Do you see her eating?

Colin: (shakes head once) Whatever sheís doing, sheís doing it very discreetly.

Regis: Yeah, oh, discreetly?

Colin: Yeah, I mean, I donít know what sheís doing. She doesnít seem to be doing...sheís doing her job brilliantly and she looks just gorgeous really. I donít think she ever got fat.

Regis: Now, at the end of the first Bridget Jones movieó

Joy: You went off together, right?

Regis: Yes, but she lost the weight, right? Didnít she come back to normal?

Colin: Yes.

Joy: Oh yes, sheís very svelte.

Regis: So now sheís got to go through that whole process again because you, apparently, you went off together but it didnít work, or did it work?

Colin: Well, I might give away trade secrets, thatís . . .

Regis: Oh, then we canít talk about that yet.

Colin: No, I can reveal that Hugh Grant and I have physically deteriorated considerably over the last three years and that weíreó

Regis: You two guys are still battling over that same woman!

Colin: We are, yeah.

Joy: You mean, youíre debauched and youíve, youíre just . . .

Regis: You like that word debauched, eh, Joy?

Joy: I like that word, yes. Well itís an interesting thing. Youíve physically deteriorated. I donít know how to . . .

Colin: Well, yes. Weíre of a certain age and the years are less and less kind to us, I think.

Regis: There you go, Joy. Take a look at it, right here (points to himself)!

Joy: Now that you mention it.

Regis: Weíre going to break. Weíll be back with Colin Firth in just a moment.

[Commercial break]

Regis: Colin Firth, our guest, has two big movies out right now. Of course, Love Actually came out a couple of weeks ago. Very big hit. A lot of fun.

Joy: Very funny movie.

Regis: One of those comedies. And now, here comes something 180 degrees opposite, The Girl With a Pearl Earring. Itís based on the life of Vermeer, the great Dutch artist, huh?

Colin: Well, Iíd like to think itís based on his life. Itís probably more correct to say that itís about the maid in his house, played by Scarlett Johanssonó

Regis: Oh? Oh! Oh yes. You want to know something, yes, youíre probably right.

Colin: And sheís . . .

Regis: Itís about this girl more than really about him isnít it?

Colin: Right, but we neednító

Joy: Itís taken from the paintingó

Colin: Yes.

Joy: And the, the author made upó

Colin: Well itís . . .

Joy: Made up the whole story around this painting, is that right?

Colin: Yes, she did. I mean, the painting, in a slightly Mona Lisa-ish fashion begs a lot of questions. And she looks out at you with this mysterious expression and you think, ďIs it innocent? Is it erotic?  What is it saying to you?Ē And, basically she did a great deal of research and invented a character for the model and everyone else is real.

Regis: Terrific idea!

Colin: Yeah.

Regis: Now, you know that could spin off a whole bunch of movies based on great artworks and somebodyís imagination about how the picture actually got made, donít you think?

Colin: Well, it could, although I think films about artists, you know, are very, very difficult to make.

Regis: Really?

Colin: A film about a fictional master painter means youíve got to get some master paintings from somewhere.

Regis: But, let me ask you something. In your research, did your character, Vermeer, actually develop a crush on this maid?

Colin: Well, that would, again, I think spoil a trade secret, because one of the things I mostó

Regis: (slaps armchair) Gelman! This guy wonít tell me anything! (laughter)

Joy: Gelman just wants the clip. He wants you to show the clip.

Colin: Well, I think it leaves people guessing at the end.

Regis: Yeah.

Colin: And Iíve got my views on what heís feels about her.

Regis: Oh?

Joy: But thereís aó

Regis: So thereís no official word on it.

Joy: Yeah.

Regis: (to Joy) What do you think?

Joy: Well, I thought there is a definite communication between the two of you but the character you play is so withdrawn and so restrained that he did nothing. . . Well I shouldnít say.

Colin: Got a heck of wig as well. Yes.

Regis: Great wig!  Looooved the wig. Did you like the wig (to Colin)?

Joy: I liked your long hair.

Colin: Yeah, it had to be prized off my head every day. I used to have that hair some years ago. 

Joy: Itís a beautiful movie, though. Isnít it?

Regis: It is a beautiful movie.

Joy: I really enjoyed it.

Regis: Thereís no doubt about it. You have to see it. Letís take a look at it right now. Hereís Colin playing Vermeer showing Griet, whoís played by Scarlett Johansson, whoís a terrific young actress. Isnít she something?

Colin: Sheís wonderful.

Regis: Anyway, she plays the servant and heís showing her a look at the painting. [film clip] You never get a look at it!

Joy: I wanted to see the painting.

Regis: We didnít get a look at it because itís a trade secret! No, but youíll see it. Itís a beautiful painting. Of course, youíve seen it already. It opens on Friday here in New York and in LA; the rest of the country in January. Colin, thank you very, very much. (shakes hand) It was great to see you.

Colin: Thank you (shakes Joyís hand)

Joy: Was great to meet you.

Regis: Weíll be right back with Seal, yes. (Regis leans to Colin) Appreciate you coming, Colin.

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